3/26/15

Hello readers, if I have any.

If you’re out there.

Hello?

I have not made a post in quite some time, and while this is usually a sign that I am getting tired of my idea, I want to assure you all that I am still waging war against the fat girl’s natural enemy; the dreaded stairs. 

I wish I could say that the only challenges I face are physical. It would be so much easier to jog up a flight of stairs than deal with the emotional strain I’ve been faced with lately. I’m not here to complain, or vent, or even preach. I’m sure everyone has dealt with their own bouts of depression. Mine might have cost me my relationship. But I’m not going to get into all that right now.

What I’m here to say is that it gets better. It will always feel like the world is ending and you are too far under to pull yourself upright. If anything has helped me through this time it has been this: This is not a permanent state of being.

I am not a professional. I don’t claim to know the ins and outs of the human condition, but I know myself. Any obstacle can be tackled. Whether it’s going up fifty steps just to get to class every day or packing up all of your stuff and living on your own for a while, I can do this, and you can too.

Sorry I got a little emotional there for a minute, but loving yourself is not just about loving your body, but taking care of yourself mentally as well.

Until next time, faithful readers.

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Spring Break

Haven't posted in a while. It's Spring Break for me so I've been up and around and am currently updating from Midlothian, Virginia where I am visiting with my friend Megan and her sweet family. I have been slacking on my squat challenge but Megan is a good motivator, so she'll volunteered to kick my backend back into shape and into routine. We'll see.

I don't have much else to say, despite my absence. Midterms are upon us and I'm afraid I will be gone a little longer yet.

Until next time.

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Happy Accident

I tried to cheat today. With the ache in my thighs from my rigorous squat schedule already burning on my trek from my car to Peck Hall, the thought of 50 steps to overcome felt unimaginable. So, I hit the little arrow by the elevator, already validating my laziness with a dozen excuses. I have my backpack with me today, and it's heavy, I whined internally. I hit the button again, as the little red light had faded. My legs hurt and I've been doing so good on my squats! The light went out again and I realized the elevator wasn't whirring the way it did when it was on its way to the bottom floor. There wasn't any sort of noise, actually. Out of order. I took this as a sign, took a deep breath, and jogged up those damn stairs! I'm pleased to announce that I did not see stars in my vision, the world did not start to go black, and I only breathed heavy for a few minutes when I finally sat down on the bench by the door to my next class. 

I'm rather proud of myself, despite needing that extra push. Thanks, unpredictable elevator outage.

Also, I'd like to point out that I look fine as hell today. I'm likely to add a photo later, so stay tuned for that~ 

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Day 1

Yesterday, the 28th of February, I did 30 squats for the challenge I mentioned in my previous post. Due to the silliness of starting 1 or something on the last day of a month instead of the first day of the month, and the fact that the 30 I did were out of form and shouldn't count anyway, TODAY will officially be my first day of the 30 Day Squat Challenge. That being said, the 30 that I did yesterday has left me so sore that going up and down the three steps to my front door is a challenge. But, I'll admit, it feels good to be sore after going so long without regular exercise.

I go to Nerd Fitness for most of my form questions and general inspiration to get fit. Not only does it speak to me on a niche sort of level, there are so many articles written about nearly everything I've ever wanted to read about, that I don't have a need to go looking anywhere else! It's a community I feel more accepted into than most of the sites I find who are into hardcore weight training while I'm just starting body weight work outs. But I digress.

During and after my initial 30 squats, I was experiencing some pain in my right knee, the one that gives me problems, and lower thigh muscles near my knees. From what I understand by reading this guide on NerdFitness.com is that my form is off. I'm putting too much of my weight on the tips of my toes rather than my heels, and I am bending forward too much, mainly because I feel like I'll fall backwards if I don't. To correct this, I tighten my core muscles and keep my back as straight as possible without relying on my lower back to pull myself back up. So far I feel like my squats are more effective, though now I hurt in a number of places. 

I'll keep y'all updated throughout my challenge. Also, because cooking is just another one of my hobbies I indulge in occasionally, I'll be sharing some of my favorite recipes from time to time. Stay tuned and keep in touch!

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Spock and Sqauts

Firstly, I'd like to interrupt this daily wellness blog to discuss some sad news. Leonard Nimoy passed away today at the age of 83. Nimoy is best known as Spock from the 1970's TV show and cult classic Star Trek, a personal favorite of mine. I grew up watching Star Trek in syndication with my father and quickly fell in love. It has been the Mecca of my nerdom and while Captain Kirk has always been my favorite (and first love), Spock will always have a place in my big ol' nerd heart. I regret never having the pleasure to meet Leonard Nimoy, but I am glad for the chance I was given to meet William Shatner and I hope he stays in good health despite losing one of his dear friends. 

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming…

Squats. I can hear the groans all over the country at the idea. They kick you ass, literally! Squats has lifted and shaped some of the best derrieres I know, and I'm starting to get jealous. I can't rely on the size of my back end alone anymore. I want it to be high and tight and maybe a little bouncy as well.

But I'm a big ol' wimp. So when I started to read the various 30 day squat challenges all over the internet, they all seemed out of my league. And then, like Goldilocks and the three bears, I found a challenge jusssst right: 30 Day Fitness Challenges' 30 Day EASY Squat Challenge. 

I'll admit, I'm still pretty apprehensive about it, but here goes nothing! I'll keep y'all updated on my progress from time to time and hopefully 30 days from now I'll be able to squat with the best of 'em!

Live long and prosper.

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The Stairs

There are fifty stair steps in between me and the third floor of the concrete building where all of my classes reside. It is these very stairs that inspired this blog title. I’ve come to count them to distract myself from the tightness in my chest and the foreboding pressure in my right kneecap. I don’t know if bad knees are inherited genetically, but the discomfort makes me feel as if I am taking after my mother, who had both of hers replaced when I was pretty young. Around step twenty, I have to remind myself to breathe. I have this bad habit of holding my breath when my chest starts to burn from exercise. It’s something I remember doing when I played soccer. Even in the best shape of my life, my asthma made it impossible to run sprints without wheezing.

I’m hoping that if I can take the stairs every time, despite the tempting elevator that a lot of the other students take, I’ll be able to jog up to the third floor and not be winded for a good five minutes. This has been my goal for a while but I have made excuses. I DO carry at least twenty pounds on my back at any given day. That’s been my main complaint but no more! The end of February might not be a celebrated time to make New Year resolutions, but here I go! I’m taking the stairs from now on. 

I’ll let y’all know when I stop wheezing.

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Fat Girl

For my first post I thought I’d write a little introduction. My name is Kelby and I am a fat girl living in Tennessee. Now, it’s important for you to know that when I refer to myself as fat, I am not being demeaning or cutting myself down, or looking for pity of any kind. I have just come to the fact that I am what I am, I am the one who brought myself here, and that no matter my size, it is my job to love myself and hopefully inspire others to do the same. My weight is not an issue, but my health is. This blog is my way of showing my process, my struggles, and my achievements.

 

(My Instagram)

This is me. While this picture is almost two year old, I still feel like it's a good representation of my body shape, and it's a super cute picture of me being active anyway.

As of Fall 2015 I am in my Junior year at Middle Tennessee State University pursuing a bachelor’s degree in English with a focus in writing. Ideally, I’d like to get into the publishing business, but anything where I can flex my writing skills and love for literature would be okay with me.

I collect hobbies like scarves, of which my collection is extensive, so I won’t include a comprehensive list but my minor is Film Studies and is something I am particularly passionate about.

Anyway, I'm sure any and all readers will learn more along the way without me spelling it all out for 'em in the first post.

Until next time,

Kelby.

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